A student asked me today why my last blog post was from September. I didn’t want to tell her it was because every time I sat down to write it sounded like I was whining. But, I did. I told her because there was so much more I could not bear to tell her.
I didn’t want to tell her that I worked so hard, and felt that I have little to show for it. I didn’t want to tell her that it is because I feel like every last inch of anything I have to offer has been drained out of me, and yet I can constantly hear the school saying, “Where’s more?” I didn’t want to tell her it is because if our API score does not go up by 30 points our school is in dire jeopardy of being given away to a charter and all of the school’s employees will be fired. I didn’t want to tell her that while I love my students, I’m tired of the culture of apathy that still exists within the walls of our school. I didn’t want to tell her that I am so proud to put out award winning books and so disappointed that the administration never gave me a nod of approval (although my students did! They had a plaque engraved for me, and awarded it to me in front of 800 students!).
And so, this is my explanation for the lack of blogs. I’m in search of educational topics that will allow me to write posts that are both positive and inspiring. And so, the search is on!
